Sharry had made her decision. She laid on a cold table with tears flowing, scared and shaking, she heard the hum of the vacuum after the nurse hit the switch. She was terrified and sick about what was to happen.
She prayed “God forgive me, I’m so sorry,” and said to her baby “I’m so sorry ........” until it was over.
In a coarse, hateful voice the nurse told her, “It was a boy.”
After the abortion procedure, her dad drove her back home and she vomited out the window on Colorado Boulevard. She had felt the life sucked out of her, not only of her baby, but her own. She was broken, empty and numb.
“ I don’t know why, at 17 years old, I was left to make that decision myself,” Sharry reflected inside the Marisol Health clinic in Lafayette. “ I wish my parents would have said, “ You’re going to have this baby and it’s going to be okay!” I wish I would have had an ultrasound. If I had seen that little baby, I couldn’t have done it.”
Sharry recently shared her story with a couple at Marisol Health who were trying to decide whether or not to have an abortion. Sharry felt compelled to share the deep regret of her abortion that is always present. Not only the first time, but the second time, also.
“There has never been a time in my life that I don’t grieve about the loss of those babies,” she shared. “It never goes away, my regrets, and heartache. I think about how old they would be today, and the blessings I could have, had I not cut them out of my life.”
Her first pregnancy was with Mark. They met in Albuquerque at a high school football game and fell madly in love. They were inseparable and planned to marry. He gave her a promise ring. Shortly after, Sharry’s parents decided to move back to Colorado, as her dad resigned from his job to start his own business. Mark and Sharry were broken hearted but vowed to stay together no matter what. Mark came to visit every chance he got. Approximately one year later, after one of Mark’s visits, Sharry discovered she was pregnant and was scared and distraught. However, she remembered how she and Mark agreed if this happened they would get married and have the baby.
They were still in high school, Sharry a sophomore and Mark a junior. When her parents found out, they supported her decision either way. His parents wanted her to get an abortion, threatening not help financially in any way, telling them it would ruin their lives and they didn’t know what love is. Mark was bewildered and Sharry felt the gut-wrenching pain of the rejection of her baby and herself. Mark stated he would get the help from his real father as his mother had remarried. Mark’s mother remarked, the man he thought was his father all his life, was not actually his real father. Mark sat in shock, wounded and out of the battle. Sharry ran away from the house where their parents gathered to discuss their fate.
She ran to house nearby that was under construction, and she cried out to God. She felt His comfort, His assurance that He was with her and He would see her through. Instead, she cried out, “No, I can’t do this, they don’t want us!” Then came her choice, the one she would regret for the rest of her life.After the abortion, she became severely depressed and even attempted to end her life by taking pills but was saved after her parents rushed her to an emergency room. The feeling of emptiness was so overwhelming she tried desperately to fill it. This desperation led to a horrific battle and slavery to Bulimia for many years. Food became her best friend, her comfort and purging seemed to release pain and this was her own secret hell, and which seemed there was no escape.
Mark tried to patch things up but didn’t understand how deeply wounded Sharry was and the suffering and humiliation the abortion had caused. She felt abandoned and betrayed by him and completely forgot how wounded he had been. There was gossip in school and the shame was too much, it destroyed their relationship and was too painful to continue. Sharry’s love turned to anger and bitterness. She began to date other men, trying to forget Mark, and two years later she had moved in with her boyfriend Jeff and found herself pregnant again. She didn’t want the baby, still feeling wounded from her last abortion.
“This time my heart was gone,” Sharry said. “I had calloused my heart. I thought, why in the world would I have this man’s baby if I didn’t have the other baby with the man I was madly in love with?”
For a time, Sharry was vehemently pro-abortion, believing in the mantra, ‘my body, my choice.’ She felt compelled to justify what she had done. “Now I know that was such a brutal lie, it is a lie from Satan used to destroy women, and it almost destroyed me.”
Many years later, Sharry married James and after three years, they wanted to start a family. She didn’t feel she deserved children after two abortions, and worried God would not bless her with children after what she had done. She prayed often and asked God to forgive her, and He did answer her prayers. Sharry and James have three grown boys and live in Boulder, Colo.
It wasn’t until recently that Sharry felt she was ready to share her testimony. There was much healing that had to be done over the years, and God was faithful. In 2020, Sharry went to Washington, D.C. to participate in Franklin Graham’s Pray March and Jonathan Cahn’s, “The Return.”
“God doesn’t give you more than you can handle and He reveals things when He feels you are ready,” Sharry said. “We were there to pray and repent about the sin of abortion, the breakdown of families and many of the other sins of our country, and for God to heal our land.”
“Due Date Too Late” was the on the ballot and Sharry was fighting for it, now passionately “Pro Life”. As she stood in line waiting for coffee between speakers, she started giving her testimony to another woman about her abortion and how the nurse told her hatefully, “It was a boy!”
The woman she spoke to said, “So you were really far along,” and then Sharry felt like she was stabbed in the heart as she remembered her own late-term abortion. She was deeply grieved, but God chose a time to give her a complete healing from the years and years of lies and accusations Satan had relentlessly told her. God was setting her free from all the shame, guilt, and spirit of rejection she had carried. Sharry was finally able to forgive herself. She now walks in complete freedom.
Sharry now shares her testimony in hopes of sparing other people, the pain and suffering of
abortion, testifying that it not only takes the lives of innocent babies but it is devastating to the women that have them.
Looking back, Sharry knows now in hindsight everything would have been okay, as God had told her in the empty house, and the time to raise a baby is such a small fraction of your life. She also wants you to know, if you have already had an abortion, there is healing and God is waiting for you with open arms.
“A baby is always a blessing,” she said. “The current laws are so wrong to allow us to legally murder of our babies, our own flesh and blood. It has a ripple effect and hurts so many people, and what they think is protecting the woman, actually ends up harming her. My prayer is you choose life.”